Vinegar Syndrome in January

From "Cthulhu Mansion" (Juan Piquer Simón, 1992)

I feel a bit bad, because I missed writing up Vinegar Syndrome's November and December releases. As a result, I didn't get to talk about what I got in the Black Friday sale (a lot more porn than I would have expected, for one), and I didn't cover what I didn't pick up. But here we are, in January, and there's a solid slate of new releases coming at the end of the month, so no need to kick ourselves in the ass for the past when the future is so near.

Take, for instance, our first film of the month, 1978's "Satan's Blood" ("Escalofrío"). If you want to grab my interest entering the new year, then put "Satan" in the title and let Earl Kessler Jr. put together some runes and a shirtless dude wielding a sacrificial dagger. It's a great take on the original Spanish poster from director Carlos Puerto. It sounds like a rad bit of Eurosleaze, with a young couple getting drawn into a secluded mansion, only to be set upon by horny devil worshippers. A new 4K scan means this will probably look better than anyone has seen this since its late 70s debut. We get both the Spanish- and English-language soundtracks, as well as a commentary track from V.S. mainstays Samm Deighan and Kat Ellinger. I'm really digging this focus on Spanish-language exploitation from Vinegar Syndrome; it's an era I'm not super familiar with, but I enjoy watching. I like simple things, like butter in my ass, and blood orgies; that's just me.

From Lucifer to Elder Gods: Spanish director Juan Piquer Simón put in some uncredited work on "Satan's Blood", as well as helming one of my personal favs, "Slugs". His 1992 movie, "Cthulhu Mansion" ("La mansión de los Cthulhu") gets a 2K restoration for its North American debut on Blu-ray. And while the title doesn't really sync up to the storyline, I doubt anyone who hasn't seen this will be disappointed. It's got punks on film, evil magicians, spooky amusement parks: it's a "Scooby Doo Mysteries" episode, done in hard-R fashion. I'm really in love with Richard Hilliard's cover art/slipcase for this release; the Chthuluized skull reminds me of a lot of the mid-Atlantic tattoo aesthetic that came out of hardcore/metal in the past 15 years. There's also a full-length documentary about Simón's career. It's in Spanish, but should come with subtitles.

Something sinister is happening in a newly-opened Barcelona apartment skyscraper. Michael Moriarty plays the hard-boiled security consultant hired to uncover the mystery behind an on-site death. Is he ready for something more than simple murder? Joined by Jenny Agutter, can this duo solve matters before another death occurs?

And that's 1988's "Dark Tower" in a nutshell, originated by Ken Weiderhorn and finished by Freddy Francis in the director's chair. The cast is deep, with the likes of Carol Linley, Theodore Bikel, and Kevin McCarthy all making appearances. I passed up a VHS copy of this I saw in a suburban Atlanta thrift store a few years ago, because I was probably being a ding dong or something. I can now rectify that mistake with this debut on region A Blu-ray, featuring a 2K scan and restoration. The interview with Steve Neill should be interesting; the former Corman and Cohen collaborator worked on a wide range of awesome movies in makeup and effects, including "Ghostbusters", "The Stuff", and "Galaxy of Terror".

Every time I decide to wait to buy a Vinegar Syndrome Archives title, it immediately sells out. It's enough to make a fella feel like a real screw up. But 2021 will be different; this year, I'm won't make the same mistakes. I know how much time that wastes. So it is with cash and hand that I happily preorder the January VSA release of 1989's "The House Of Usher". I don't know a ton about Australian director Alan Birkinshaw, other than his work on "Killer's Moon", which I'm pretty sure I saw a third-gen dub of sometime in the late 90s. But 1989 was an incredibly productive year for him, between this, another Poe inspired film in "The Red Masque Of Death", and his adaptation of Agatha Christie's "Ten Little Indians". The latter two featured...you guessed it, Frank Stallone! VS says this is the first time "House Of Usher" has been released on disc; I believe them. Oliver Reed and Donald Pleasence star alongside TV mainstay Romy Windsor. You get a limited to 4,000 piece, Region A Blu-ray with 2K scan and restoration and the always enjoyable bottom loading slipcase. A bargain now at $27.99, compared to what we'll be paying in six months on eBay, no doubt.

AGFA has a pair of releases in January, the first of which is inventively named "The AGFA Horror Trailer Show". And, because they are big believers in truth in advertising, what viewers get here is, indeed, a big ass Blu-ray, chock full of horror trailers. Normally, I'm a bit dubious about collections of trailers (smut comps being the exception). Here, however, I'm absolutely intrigued what the kids at AGFA have dug out of their archives. They describe it as "the most spine-ripping, slime-slinging, soul-shredding horror trailers that you’ve never seen." After watching their trailer, I'm inclined to believe them. And if that weren't enough, there's the bonus feature of "VIDEORAGE", which is nothing but direct-to-video and shot-on-video horror trailers. Slice me off a hunk of that and serve me a pair of biscuits to mop it up with.

As for "The Curious Dr. Humpp", I can only say that I must have it. A true Argentinian curiosity from 1969, this was originally shot by Emilio Vieyra as a straightforward horror film, only to mutate into a pretty legendary blend of Italian horror, Buñuel-esque surrealism, and late 60s grindhouse smut. As they'd say back in the day, "far out!" Not only do you get a 2K restoration of the film that Something Weird has been sharing on DVD for years, you also get Vieyra's "La venganza del sexo" cut, also with a 2K restoration. It even gets English subtitles for the first time ever. "Basket Case" & "Frankenhooker" director Frank Henenlotter, whose ouevre owes a bit to "Dr. Humpp", provides commentary on "Humpp". I'm sure that's going to be worth the price of admission. There's also a line on the VS website stating there will be "brain damaged shorts and trailers from Dr. Humpp’s laboratory" on this release. I don't know what that implies, but I'm dying to find out.

We end our January lineup, as we normally do when we have the opportunity, taking a look at the classic pornography whose preservation Vinegar Syndrome has built their business upon. It's worth mentioned (to me, at least) that regardless of the sexual nature (and politics thereof) of the films, these are as worth studying and discussing as any lost film or indie curiosity. To say they don't make them like this anymore is an understatement; it's a lost era of filmmaking that's never coming back, sadly.

Take, for instance, this double film Blu-ray release in the Peekarama series. "Taxi Girls" and "Heavenly Desire" are a duo of sex comedies from the Israeli-American director Jourdan Alexander (directing under his birthname of Jaacov Jaacovi here), who had a reputation for making these sort of things. His trademark was casting talent that resembled Hollywood starlets, then letting them fuck on film. What you end up with are movies that are both arousing and, dare I say, pretty damned funny. "Taxi Girls" is led by Nancy Suiter in one of her iconic roles, Seka headlines "Heavenly Desire", and Serena stars opposite both in each film. Add in appearances from John Holmes, Jamie Gillis, Aubrey Nichols, and Johnny Keyes, and you have a pair of movies well worth watching.

From "Satan's Blood" (Carlos Puerto, 1978)

So, what am I buying? I think I'll cop that "Taxi Girls"/"Heavenly Desire" 2-pack, as well as both AGFA releases to start. If I'm feeling real frisky (aka I come into some loose money), I'll add on "The House Of Usher". As always, if all four Vinegar Syndrome/VSA titles float your boat, you can save some serious bread ordering the the January 2021 Package, at a relative bargain price of just $99.99 (with free shipping!). I promise to be back in less than 30 days with the February lineup. Until then: be easy, and don't go blind.